What you have to say? とはどういう意味ですか?

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Non-verbal communication is as loud as yelling, says Dr. Setting such ridiculous expectations just screws with your mind and improves nothing. Going straight from nervous to assuming rapport successfully may be too big of a leap.

And you will have whatever you say! But by turning those feelings into offerings of support you make the feelings useful. An open question requires an explanation for an answer rather than just a simple yes or no.

You Will Have Whatever You Say

When Someone You Know Has Cancer Finding out that someone you know has cancer can be difficult. You may have many and about how you should talk to and act around this person. If the person with cancer is a co-worker, you might also wonder how your work situation will be affected by their diagnosis and treatment. Supervisors may wonder what they can do to best help the person while still getting the work done. Communication and flexibility are the keys to success. What to expect when someone you know has cancer Possible physical changes There are some common physical changes shared by many people with cancer. The cancer itself causes some of these changes and others are the result of side effects of cancer treatment. Keep in mind that each cancer journey is different. People report that fatigue can be overwhelming, and they are surprised at how tired they can feel long after treatment ends. It can take a long time to heal after surgery, and people can feel tired for months after an operation. People getting also report extreme fatigue. Someone with cancer may also experience stress and emotional concerns, which add to exhaustion. Fatigue can go on for many months after treatment is over. Possible emotional changes Each person reacts in their own way to cancer and its treatment. Someone with cancer can feel good one day and terrible the next. Expect that they will have good days and bad days. Learning to live with uncertainty is part of learning to live with cancer, both for the patient and for the people around them. There may be times when the uncertainty and fear cause the person with cancer to seem angry, depressed, or withdrawn. This is normal and is a part of the process of grieving what was lost to the cancer things like health, energy, time. Over time, most people are able to adjust to the new reality in their lives and go forward. Some may need extra help from a support group or a mental health professional to learn to deal with the changes cancer has brought into their lives. For more on this, please see. How does someone cope with cancer. People develop all kinds of coping styles during their lives. Some people are quite private, while others are more open and talk about their feelings. These coping styles help people manage difficult personal situations, although some styles work better than others. Some people use humor and find it to be a relief from the serious nature of the illness. But some may become withdrawn and isolated from family and friends. A cancer diagnosis creates a lot of change. People often try to maintain as much control as they can in order to feel more secure. Some people become very angry or sad. They might be grieving the loss of their own healthy self-image, or the loss of control over their own lives. Some people find it helps to simply be hopeful and do what they can to maintain that hope. Hope means different things to different people. And people can hope for many things while facing cancer. You might assume that someone who is positive and optimistic must be denying the fact that they have cancer. Making the most of every day may simply be their way of coping. For more information, please see. How important is working to a person with cancer. Work can be a safe haven away from the medical world and can help a person balance the feeling of being out of control. Work is also a source of stability because it has a routine and is familiar. And work provides contact with other people. Cancer can be isolating, and being around people can be a great comfort. It may be very important for your co-worker to be at work as much as possible and be as productive as possible. Financial and insurance issues may also affect the decision to work during treatment. Cancer what you have to say cause money problems. The person may lose pay by being absent from work during and just after treatment. Employees may also need to pay more of their insurance premium if they work fewer hours or take time off for treatment. In some cases, health coverage may be stopped or decreased if they go to a part-time schedule. A lot depends on your workplace policies. Co-pays can reach burdensome amounts. There are also parking fees, gasoline, and the costs of other services and equipment not covered by insurance. The costs add up very quickly. You might not know the person very well, or you may have a close relationship. It can be harder in the workplace because relationships with co-workers are so varied. You might not know the person very well, or you may have worked together for many years and be close friends. The most important thing you can do is mention the what you have to say in some way that feels comfortable for you. Sometimes the simplest expressions of concern are the most meaningful. And sometimes just listening is the most helpful thing you can do. Doing these things might seem to discount their what you have to say real fears, concerns, or sad feelings. But while you may know this is a trying time, no one can know exactly how any person with cancer feels. Using humor can be an important way of coping. It can also be another approach to support and encouragement. This can be a great way to relieve stress and take a break from the more serious nature of the situation. But you never want to joke unless you know the person with cancer can handle it and appreciate the humor. If they look good, let them know. Everyone is different, and these stories may not be helpful. Then they can pick up the conversation from there. Respecting the privacy of someone who has cancer If someone tells you that they have cancer, you should never tell anyone else unless they have given you permission. Let them be the one to tell others. No matter how close you are, it may take time for the person to adjust to the diagnosis and be ready to tell others. Focus on how you can support that person now that you know. For more about this, please see. How do I get over feeling uncomfortable around someone who has cancer. Feeling sorry for them, or feeling guilty for being healthy yourself, are normal responses. But by turning those feelings into offerings of support you make the feelings useful. Asking how you can help can take away some of the awkwardness. Be honest with the person about how you feel. You might find that talking about it is easier than you think. Cancer often reminds us of our own mortality If you are close in age to the person with cancer or if you are very fond of them, you may find that this experience creates anxiety for you. You might notice feelings somewhat like those of the person who has cancer: disbelief, sadness, uncertainty, anger, sleeplessness, and fears about your own health. If this is the case, you may want to get support for yourself from a mental health professional or a local support group. You can also use other sources of counseling, such as your health insurance or religious support services. Some people are very private while others will openly talk about their illness. Let them be the one to tell you if the commitment is too much to manage. Sometimes a caring listener is what the person needs the most. While greater patience and compassion are called for during times like these, your friend should continue to respect your feelings, as you respect their feelings. They need to feel like a valuable contributing member of the company or department. Cancer can force us to look at our own fears about illness, weakness, or death. This may make us what you have to say to interact with someone facing cancer. But isolation can be a problem for people with cancer. Make an extra effort to reach out. Remember that the person you know with cancer may find it hard to ask for help or may be worried about seeming weak or vulnerable. Families can put subtle pressure on people with cancer by expecting or needing them to be strong all the time. In that case, you might play an important role for a friend who has cancer. They may know you well and trust you enough to confide in you. This kind of relationship can be a great gift for a person facing cancer. If they need medical equipment or money for treatment, you can look into getting something donated or organize a raffle to help raise money. Or you can simply take up a collection to buy something that might not be covered by insurance. The person with cancer may look to you for advice regarding financial worries, work issues, or other concerns. Help if you can, but if you feel uncomfortable, say so. There are many places a person can get help and support, and you might suggest seeking the advice of a professional who is best suited to give that kind of guidance. Keep in mind, too, that those close to the person with cancer will also need help and support. A family member who is responsible for the care of the person with cancer can become isolated and stressed. If you know that person, you may want to check in to see how they are doing, too. They might also be able to share ideas about how you can best help the person with cancer. Continue to treat your friend as normally as possible. Include them in activities and social events. Keep inviting them unless they tell you otherwise. Ask what would be most helpful. Arrange a schedule of meal delivery. Arrange a schedule of day care pick-ups. Always check with them first before making party plans, including showing them the list of those to be invited. In some cases, the cancer will come back recur and treatment will begin again. The person with cancer may or may not react in the same way they did the first time. Many people are quite upset when they learn the cancer is back. Others seem to accept a recurrence more easily. They may have expected it, or are simply ready, for whatever reasons, to fight again. By equipping yourself with the knowledge of how best to talk to the person with cancer, you can be most helpful to them. Cancer Facts and Figures 2016. Atlanta, Ga: American Cancer Society. Costa-Requena G, Ballester Arnal R, Gil F. The influence of coping response and health-related quality of life on perceived social support during cancer treatment. Social networks, social support, and survival after breast cancer diagnosis. Social support what you have to say health-related quality of life in women with breast cancer: a longitudinal study. Stressful life events and risk of breast cancer in 10,808 women: a cohort study. Nakaya N, Tsubono Y, Hosokawa T, et al. Personality and the risk of cancer. Nakaya N, Tsubono Y, Nishino Y. Personality and cancer survival: the Miyagi cohort study. Loneliness, depression, what you have to say social support of patients with cancer and their caregivers. Impact of functional support on health-related quality of life in patients with colorectal cancer.

They may have expected it, or are simply ready, for whatever reasons, to fight again. Puhn uses this example: Say your husband forgot to bring cash to a cash-only event. It's not that they don't realize you had a fight, says Sussman. Saying it will turn out fine dismisses her anxiety about the outcome as trivial. It's completely normal—and healthy—for couples to argue. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident. Don't walk away if he re-approaches the argument. They might mumble some words or simply choose the wrong word, one that does not truly reflect what they mean.